It's not easy to talk to your children about the death of their pet. It's a difficult situation to face as an adult, but as a child who's trying to make sense of the world, their best friend in their dog or cat, dying is never going to be an easy subject to cover.
If your pet has been sick and you know that you're going to have to make the very difficult decision to put them down, You also have to figure out how you're going to explain it to your child and we've got some tips for you below.
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Thing to do is acknowledge the loss. Pet loss is very real. How you say goodbye to a pet can begin a certain amount of preparation and help them to understand what death means in general. Taking your children with you to choose the right urn and even choose the right resting place for your pet can make a big difference to how they process the information. You can discuss life spans or even hold a simple pet funeral to help them to grasp the concept of death better. It's important that you acknowledge their loss because for your child, it's going to be a big deal.
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Be as honest as you can. When your child asks if their pet has died, tell them yes. It's important to be honest with your child and answer any questions that they have in a way that is age appropriate. Some questions may include why their pet has died or will they ever see them again. Some children don't really grasp that death is permanent, and others will think it's their fault. It's not easy to explain to a child the concept of death, but it's important that you keep the conversation as short and honest as you can so that they can understand and process through it.
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Share how you're feeling. One of the biggest things that you can do to help your children to understand a pet has died is to be honest about your own feelings about it. They need to see you processing death, and they need to see you processing grief. That doesn't mean any of it's going to be easy for any of you, but parents and children who share their emotions together will always feel more comfortable and comforted as a result.
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Don't cut off the conversation. Keeping the conversation going and allowing your child to talk about it as much as they need is important. It's a shared experience and a shared love. And while it may be difficult for you to constantly talk about the death, you have to help your child to process it in a way that makes sense. Talk about what happens after death, and start linking those conversations to human life and other animals too, so that they can see that death is just a simple part of the way life goes.
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Validate how they feel. This is not something you should ignore or push to one side. A pet is going to mean a lot to your child and you have to validate how they feel about that death. Don't ignore it as if it never happened.
